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"How can a parenting book help build the self esteem of a child without first building the self esteem of the parents?" - Lisa Dunning, MA, MFT
Your child has done something you believe is inappropriate, but your spouse doesn't think it is that big of a deal. You argue about the severity of your child's behavior, but your spouse just doesn't see things your way.
You ask yourself, "Should I discipline my child? Am I overreacting?" as you doubt your own ability to parent when it seems that no one is on your side.
Feeling confused about your ability to parent, you talk to a couple of friends or other family members, hoping to gain support for your parenting beliefs. After gaining support for your opinion, you feel justified and confident that you are right. So you quickly approach your spouse, saying "All my friends agree with me." as proof your spouse was wrong. Only your spouse doesn't react the way you expected.
Instead of saying, "You were right, honey. I don't know what I was thinking.", your spouse responds, "I don't care what your friends or family say and I can't believe you shared our personal family matters with them!"
Learning your lesson you decide to parent your child without talking to your spouse unaware that you have just given your child tremendous power. When your child gets upset about your discipline, your worst fear is realized when your child tells your spouse about the discipline you decided on your own. Another argument ensues and your spouse begins to completely undermine your efforts to parent your child by allowing...
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